After months of abusing your nose when you walk into the store, a local Hy-Vee has finally sold their first bath bomb.
“It’s just a huge step toward a lovely new area of our store. Yes, it’s been a couple of months since we opened it, and yes, it’s not made any money, and yes, it burns nostril hairs when you walk in the store, but it’s really the future of Hy-Vee!” said one representative we spoke with.
Many Hy-Vee shoppers have been very vocally against the new bath and body sections that have taken over entrances to their local store.
“So, imagine you’re walking in just needing to grab some chips and salsa,
and then out of nowhere, you’re tear gassed by the bath and body worker. I
seriously walk out of Hy-Vee like I was a protester in the 1960’s,” said one local Hy-Vee customer we spoke with.
No word on what kind of celebration Hy-Vee will be having quite yet, but we would assume they are probably going to bring in some washed up sports stars to make a media appearance.
“To celebrate this huge milestone of 1 bath bomb sold in one of our Sioux
Falls stores, we are going to continue to shove Mark Wahlberg down your throat when you shop at our stores. Did you know we are the exclusive grocer to carry his products?!” said the representative.
Hy-Vee aims to sell at least 1 more bath bomb before the year ends.
The Sioux Falls Headliner
Adam K. White