A huge victory for Sioux Falls drivers as city officials turned away the giant Iowan caravan that was headed to Sioux Falls this past weekend.
“We had a lot of information on when the caravan would be at our gates. We thought they would be here this past weekend, but they drove slower than we anticipated, making them late,” said one Sioux Falls Police Department representative we spoke with.
It’s still unclear as to why the Iowan caravan was headed to Sioux Falls, but many are speculating that they came to eat, shop, and drive slowly in front of Sioux Falls citizens.
“We need to accept these people waving other state flags that want to come to our city to eat, shop, and drive slowly in front of us. It’s part of being a Sioux Fallsite!” said one local we spoke with.
Many others were very glad the caravan was sent back to Sioux City.
“They’re in charge in Sioux City, that doesn’t mean they get a free ride to come here to Sioux Falls and ruin us. Eat, shop, and drive slowly in your own damn city!” said another citizen we spoke with.
The Iowan caravan is said to make it back to Sioux City slower than anticipated.
The Sioux Falls Headliner
Adam K. White
Great work. No doubt there were Middle Eastern Iowans in that group, and possibly Iowa-13 gang members. Send them all to Sioux City and let THEM sort them out.
So you dont want them to come to your town and spend their money? Typical Sioux Falls mentality “to good for others!”
*too
In fact there is a precedent. I came back to SF to visit Mom and she told me with great plride that they had repelled the hippies! A VW van with 5 or 6 east coast hippies stopped in SF and camped out in a house for a few days. They got invited to talk to a class at Augustana College, and urged the students to consider a trip to San Francisco. They were headed for Haight Ashbury. Finding this inherently outrageous, the locals complained to the PD, who offered to jail the kids for vagrancy (no cash, no source of income or permanent address) and handed them off to the Sheriff, who escorted them to the MN line. The MN highway patrol escorted them south to Iowa, where sheriff or HP escorted them to the NE line, where in turn County or State escorted them west past the Omaha area, and released them with a warning. Mom was really proud of the cooperation. Breathing with Intent to Live, were the charges.
They’re gonna take your jobs!
All Gang members, criminals and rapists and
IowaSIS members.
The least Sioux Falls could have done is locked up all the kids.
Great job on the satire!