With more and more closing coming to the Empire Mall, a movement has picked up steam recently and citizens are starting to like the idea more and more.
“Malls are dying across the United States, so why not try and convert ours to a new high school?! It has a huge parking lot, separate rooms for classrooms, a food court with a few different options, kids are already hanging out there, and locks on all the doors for safety!” said the leader of the movement.
Sioux Falls has longed for another high school for the past decade, but politicians have stricken down any kind of plans for that in favor of catering to rich tourists.
“We obviously needed a huge event center before a high school. Our tourists aren’t going to high school here. Why would we build one of those?” said a former administration.
All 8 Empire Mall regulars would probably be devastated by this news, but voter believe they would understand the sacrifice.
“I know the mall is slowly dying and having another high school would be great for my kids who are waiting lists to get in, but I just love Old Navy so much,” said 1 of the 8 mall regulars.
If converted, the new high school will have to be named Jefferson to keep with the Mount Rushmore Presidential last names of Sioux Falls high schools.
The Empire Mall’s latest casualty in Hallmark.
The Sioux Falls Headliner
Adam K. White