There’s a chance that you’ll be seeing some used needles on the hiking trails this summer, and it’s not for the reasons you might be thinking.

“We’ve had multiple cases where the tree has overdosed and we had to pump the syrup out to save it,” said a local hospital representative.

It comes as a surprise to many that these trees can do such a thing, but others aren’t so surprised.

“Have you seen what these trees have to put up with? Harsh winters, hot summers, squirrels, that weird guy who eats bark, and especially birds constantly shi**ing on them. I would probably start doing drugs too,” said one local citizen we spoke with.

Experts also chimed in that trees should have the choice to go to rehabilitation like citizens.

“We need to treehabilitate, so they can flourish in the future. Literally and figuratively,” said a treehabilitation expert.

Tree rehabilitation also showed up on Mayor Paul TenHaken’s “Things I should probably do in my first 100 days” list that was released to the public earlier this week.

No word on how the new Mayor will deal with this most recent plague to hit the Sioux Falls area.

The Sioux Falls Headliner
Adam K. White